I assumed the forecast, for an inch or so of snow, meant the town would react in a reasonable fashion, that is, it would force people to school and then freak out later. So I woke my patient and amazing child, and made her a lunch and then checked to see if there was in fact school today. Pro-tip - this is NOT the order to do these things in. And there wasn't any school. We are having the first snow day of the YEAR people, this is NOT normal. She was pleased because as a senior she does not have to make up snow days this year. And she didn't really want to go back to bed, even though when left to her own devices she'll sleep until 3 pm, and I'd woken her up a full work day earlier than this, so we went out for breakfast. In the snow. She ordered apologetic blueberry pancakes, and I drank the mocha of contrition, and then we went to acquire groceries and noticed the tiny pineapples, so we made up a story about the large adults foraging for food while one stood guard over the babies, and took pictures and I'll post it to FB later today, and then when looking at the children's art supplies she noticed with horror that all the condoms and family planning and menstrual gear was opposite them in the aisle. We agreed it had to do with genitalia. And then we realized it had to do with things that inserted into women's genitalia and then we laughed so hard they nearly tossed us out of the store, and we finished the grocery shopping and came home. Her dad pointed out that failure to use one end of the aisle correctly meant you'd be in the other end of the aisle with the baby stuff, but we still had residual giggles from everything. I think, in retrospect it is a fine thing to normalize all of that, and having it across from the kids' art supplies is one way to do exactly that. But still.
Now she's passed out in the comfy chair with 1/4 of the (bloody enormous and seemingly neverending) stripy afghan I am knitting. Only 1/4 of it is in final form. Another 1/4 is on the needles, and the remaining half is still merely planned for. She is really small for her age, and she curls up smaller.
Once she wakes up again we'll make grilled cheese sammiches with lots of butter on white bread that toasts well, and then Friday dinner is at my hose tonight and the large girl is coming for supper with the young man and two of his room mates.
I am leading a good life here.
rain headed our way
still no snow
I ... don't mind, much, although it feels wrong and I like a good snowstorm
I have new music - soundtracks for Hamilton, New Home and Rotten
Played with soundtracks for Mathilda and Urinetown, it makes for an interesting collection of concepts.
i still don't miss riding. I feel bad about that, but not enough to force myself to go back to it
but it is still unexpected - I have always wanted to ride.
I have (re)started using HabitRPG which is now Habitica. I like the scheduling and the lists and it is easier to use than other actual list managers that adults are supposed to use.
words I like today:
- sea change
- eggplant, also aubergine
like mumbling, or burbling
but some of each
and not so complainy
as natter and gromish
AnneMarie says the kids with smaller vocabularies use thing more
the guy, who did that thing,
that thing over there, and not this thing
in that movie
the thing is, when you ahve inadequate words, the wold shrinks, I think.
like not having a word for blue,
until you find a piece of the sky
under your hand
in the dessert, and realize
this color, this handful of rock is also the color of the arch of sky
which before was colorless, the color of weather and clouds and
sunrise and sunset
and none of those are blue, or blue enough to find a word for them
some feathers are blue, which makes
sense in a magical fashion, that jays in their raucous dissent
carry flashes of sky and reflection
and that not one atom of their feathers so blue has pigment
you can take it all apart and find
but when assembled, those feathers reflect light from the sun
the same way the sky does
Al got stuck in Austin Texas over the weekend due to the East Coast Snowstorm closing down Atlanta where he was supposed to change planes. He made it home yesterday, and it is nice to have him home again. He's been traveling a lot lately.
Alice has heard from Mass College of Liberal Arts out to the west of us that she's accepted - I think her safety school and her default school and her preferred school are all UMass Amherst, and she hasn't heard from them yet. I can't imagine they'd turn her down, but random is random and you really never know what is going to happen.
Today was hrder than necessary. I slept badly and woke up too early and my bed was gritty and noisy and the wrong temperature and I wound up awake and vertical an hour earlier than I meant to. It means I can do a long slow stooge about the house getting awake and organized, but it also means I crash and burn at 5 pm and never actually get to do anything after supper.
I feel like I am still struggling with post-dream issues. The dreams were not horrifying at the time, but one had my father rowing out to sea and leaving a note telling us not to call the Coast Guard. Within the dream I was trying to explain to my brother that my dad was done. He's tired, he's old, he's not sure why he's still around, and he would be Ok with being done. Which is a truth, but not necessarily one I am willing to face right now when outside of a dream. That one required me to call my brother AND father to make sure everyone is Ok. They were fine.
The musical is nervewracking.
The set is going together, structurally it is more solid than last year, better engineering on my part.
there are more moving parts, and they are bigger than anything I had to make before.
I still have not figured out/decided how I want to do the cardboard skylines
I have a new large artwork underway, fixing some of the issues I had with the Yooge brown Laced Thing
. This will also be Yooge and brown and laced, just.... better.
Some thinking after talking to someone about my work steadily for an hour:
I love my landscape
I love the terrain I live in
why does it feel harder to make those?
why do I baulk at making more landscapes and veer into this open abstract terrain instead
I like the stories of the people who dashed off a song to fill an album and made a hit, and they never loved it the way all of the world loved it, they instead had a secret special difficult piece of their they loved harder and perpetually carry some disdain for all those shallow souls loveing that stupid little ditty when if they were just paying attention they could see the depths and interest in the difficult soul.
Apparently, so I read, Monet got really sick of waterlilies
but also they were the thing of his everyone wanted, and sale of them made his comfortable life possible
so how do you do the work and sell the work and have secret favorites that are difficult and have acclaim for the easy stupid stuff?
What makes the easy stuff stupid - I think that might be a different question and more to the point. If you are thinking about it, and using talent and skill developed over time through practice, just because it is easy for you doesn't mean it isn't a super power.
I took all of the unhung output from the studio for the last year or so, plus the book of 2008 - 2012 (I should/could update or replace that) into the hills to talk to someone about what to do next. It was kind of therapy for art (which is still not art therapy) or coaching, or something... mostly she asked questions, and I answered them.
She was really really attracted to the second small Monhegan painting I'd stitched into:
Which I still don't quite get - it is neither excellent painting nor it is the usual kind of stitching I do, it is some peculiar in-between thing that needs thinking about. Maybe that is the draw? Sally said the piece at Crane's got a lot of comment and was sold before she got to the opening, a scant half hour into the evening.
After a lot of nattering on my part, my assignment is to stitch into all the painting I did on the island over the summer, on the one hand, and on the other hand, make another yooge laced thing with a river on it. This shows a close-up on part of it, and I have a couple things I can do on the next one to make it better. It might take multiple attempts to get it better. I know how to start though, and that is something.
In other news: bloody cold, wind peeling from the west, I am still slightly surprised not to awake to find the house somewhere to the east of here, either by inches (moderately likely, given the lack of building codes) or miles (more whimsical and possibly requiring additional lift from surfaces not yet installed).
The Apex of Apathy has hit me already. Send Ice Cream! Send Cake! The Thermal Minimum for the year is upon us!!
We are looking at a family trip to Europe this spring, and flailing attempting to find a theme. Around England we went with "actual places children's books we love are based on and in" and that got us the Lake district for Swallows and Amazons and Beatrix Potter, London for a handful of basic London things and also the Globe Theater, and then Stonehenge and the territory where A. A. Milne summered and wrote the Pooh stories. People! We played Poohsticks on the bridge out of the illustration and it was magic.
So we were brianstorming last night after supper and it looks like we are chasing Roman ruins, ice age humans, science museums and rando architecture/geography frex Mont St Michel. We don't do art museums gracefully, but we'll walk a lot.
Any suggestions for A) fiction to help us think about the area or B) things we might want to be sure to see? I am hoping for modern, possibly YA, not hugely depressing fiction... The two I could think of offhand are both from Hilary McKay: Saffy's Angel, that has some parts in Italy, and Exiles in Love that is at least half in France and has possibly the MOST beautiful scene of a small child communicating with shopkeepers to acquire food ever. Particualrly after her elder sisters basically had a meltdown on overload from attempting to remember what French they knew and ended up shouting "SHUT UP SHUT UP" in French at the shopkeepers. I have a lot of sympathy for all concerned in that scene.
I actually googled this, because I am a nerd.
Also I live in the internet, and it is second nature to ask Uncle Google what I should do next.
the concensus is that I show up regularly, practice, and get useful critiques
taking some lessons is important, but not as important as practice
but practice doesn't help if you are practicing the wrong things, thus lessons (or critiques)
I have tabs open on how to get your portfolio looked at by a gallery,
how to brand yourself (ouch), top 10 ways to improve your art
, 12 steps to some other thing and 16 things I am supposed to do to be noticed
. And those are just the ones I will cop to. There are more embarrassing ones, and less useful ones in there as well.
I think a lot of it is putting in the work. And I have been shirking the work. I am accomplishing other things, like a musical, and the Santa Show which was hilarious and I made the sound board go (yay me!!) but yeah. My room has visible floor space in it, and I have not actually done any work for months. I was, apparently, demoralized by the lack of sales at the last show. And repeated rejections from various shows and competitions. I was doing so well in the spring! I have failed so solidly since mid-summer!
Time to get moving again.
because excuses are boring
750 words is down, and I was stymied for a minute, and though about pouring my brain out here and decided not to thank you.
I used to use tags, because I though I might want to find things again. Now I just want to tell you, my friends who are reading, what is happening, roughly, and then have it fade away into the mists of time. Also I am bad at tags.
We have an entire production team for the musical. We found one last person with experience conducting instruments, and he seems fine but I had not realized how much I was loving the team entirely composed of women who take zero shit. Also I find I am thinking about what I will and will not put up with from him in terms of questions, talking over, and making suggestions other people have already made. I have a design for the set - I need to make the little model and see if it all fits onstage the way I think it will, and then start thinking about how to make cardboard look like bricks, concrete and stone.
Not riding seems to be agreeing with me, and while I feel bad about not missing it, but I am totally not missing it. I should go up to the barn with S's mended quarter sheet, except even that doesn't feel necessary at all because it is the middle of December an 50+ Fahrenheits out there and when the sun shines no one even needs a sweater.
Instead of artwork I am cleaning my room. It makes me alternately want to cry and laugh, but I keep plugging and listening to all the 99% invisibles I have saved to listen to in tough times. I think I am clearing out space for a big sit-down long arm sewing machine. It should make quilting/stitching the bigger works easier, and allow for EVEN BIGGER WORK WOO!!! except I have to completely clear a 5'x5' section of the room that is full of Al's stuff that is beyond a wall of my stuff.
This time of year is crazy, and I am glad to spending more of it in the auditorium working on the Santa Show, until next weekend. After that, the holiday is upon me, and I will submit.
anyone want to come visit between XMas and New Year? We'll look at bones, and admire the Mammoth and eat sublime brunch food.